He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize