the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
