Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
