Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Randomize
