I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
