I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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