So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
