Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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