she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
That accounts for only three of the penises
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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