new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
