i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
