sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
