i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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