I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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