There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize