my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
