Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize