I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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