I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
my liver is dry heaving
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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