have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
