so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
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Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
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The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize