Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
do herpes really smell.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
