Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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