She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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