I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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