Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
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