im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
