He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
sex in a hospital.. check
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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