YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
i just google imaged poop.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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