I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
