Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home