How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
