so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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