I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Randomize