Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
