so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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