Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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