don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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