Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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