he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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