they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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