Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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