im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
