I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
