This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize