the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
