I can't watch pbs sober anymore
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
not ubering you a puppy
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
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