Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
