you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
