it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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