Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Randomize
