I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
